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Brer Rabbit was in the woods one afternoon when a great wind came up. It blew on the ground and it blew in the tops of the trees. It blew so hard that Brer Rabbit was afraid a tree might fall on him, and he started running.
He was trucking through the woods when he ran smack into Brer Lion. Now, don’t come telling me ain’t no lions in the United States. Ain’t none here now. But back in yonder times, all the animals lived everywhere. The lions and tigers and elephants and foxes and what’nall run around with each other like they was family. So that’s how come wasn’t unusual for Brer Rabbit to run up on Brer Lion like he done that day.
“What’s your hurry, Brer Rabbit?”
“Run, Brer Lion! There’s a hurricane coming.”
Brer Lion got scared. “I’m too heavy to run, Brer Rabbit. What am I going to do?”
“Lay down, Brer Lion. Lay down! Get close to the ground!”
Brer Lion shook his head. “The wind might pick me up and blow me away.”
“Hug a tree, Brer Lion! Hug a tree!”
“But what if the wind blows all day and into the night?”
“Let me tie you to the tree, Brer Lion. Let me tie you to the tree.”
Brer Lion liked that idea. Brer Rabbit tied him to the tree and sat down next to it. After a while, Brer Lion got tired of hugging the tree.
“Brer Rabbit? I don’t hear no hurricane.”
Brer Rabbit listened. “Neither do I.” “Brer Rabbit? I don’t hear no wind.” Brer Rabbit listened. “Neither do I.”
“Brer Rabbit? Ain’t a leaf moving in the trees.”
Brer Rabbit looked up. “Sho’ ain’t.”
“So untie me.”
“I’m afraid to, Brer Lion.”
Brer Lion began to roar. He roared so loud and so long, the foundations of the Earth started shaking. Least that’s what it seemed like, and the other animals came from all over to see what was going on.
When they got close, Brer Rabbit jumped up and began strutting around the tied-up Brer Lion. When the animals saw what Brer Rabbit had done to Brer Lion, you better believe it was the forty-eleventh of Octorerarry before they messed with him again.
One year Brer Tiger moved into the community. None of the animals wanted to have a thing to do with him. He was so weird-looking with them black and orange stripes. Not only that, he was big, looked like he didn’t have no friends and didn’t want none. Everybody kept their distance, everybody except Brer Rabbit.
Brer Tiger was hardly moved into his house good when Brer Rabbit invited him to go for a walk so they could get acquainted.
They were strolling along chatting with one another when they came to a creek. Neither one wanted to wade across and get his feet wet. Brer Rabbit saw a vine hanging from a tree and he swung across to the other side. Brer Tiger thought that looked easy enough, so he grabbed the vine and started to swing across. But he’s such a heavy creature that the vine broke and he landed smack dab in the middle of the creek – KER-SPLASH!
When he drug himself out and saw Brer Rabbit sitting on the bank laughing, he growled. Brer Rabbit laughed again.
“How come you ain’t scared of me like all the other animals?” Brer Tiger wanted to know. “Everybody else run when my shadow hits the ground.”
“How come the fleas ain’t scared of you?” Brer Rabbit asked. “They littler than me.”
Brer Tiger didn’t like that kind of sass. “You best be glad I had my breakfast, ’cause if I was hungry you’d be in my stomach now.”
Brer Rabbit looked at him. “Brer Tiger, I’m gon’ tell you something. If you’d done that, you’d have more sense in you than you got now.”
Brer Tiger growled louder. “I’m going to let you off this time, but next time I see you, you mine.”
Brer Rabbit laughed. “If you so much as dream about messing with me, I want you to get up the next morning and come apologize.”
Brer Rabbit hopped away. Brer Tiger got so mad he grabbed a tree and clawed all the bark off it.
Brer Rabbit was angry too. He shook his fist at the tree stumps and carried on like he was quarreling with his shadow because it was following after, him.
He hadn’t gone far when he heard a terrible noise. It was Brer Elephant tramping through the woods, eating off the tops of the trees. Brer Rabbit marched up to him.
“Brer Elephant, how would you like to help me run Brer Tiger back where he came from?”
“Well, having him in the community sho’ done lowered property values, Brer Rabbit, but I don’t know. If I help you, I won’t get hurt, will I?”
“What can hurt something as big as you?”
“Brer Tiger got sharp claws and big teeth. He might bite and scratch me.”
Brer Rabbit said, “Don’t worry about that. Just do what I say and we’ll run Brer Tiger away from here.”
Early the next morning Brer Rabbit was up and moving about. When he saw Brer Tiger coming, he ran to where he’d told Brer Elephant to wait. Brer Rabbit tied a long vine around one of Brer Elephant’s hind legs and tied the other end to a big tree. Then Brer Elephant kneeled down and Brer Rabbit hopped on.
A couple of minutes later Brer Tiger came up and saw Brer Rabbit on Brer Elephant’s back. He smiled. He thought Brer Rabbit was caught up there and couldn’t get down. Brer Elephant started swinging backward and forward and rocking from side to side.
“Well, Brer Rabbit. I ain’t had my breakfast this morning and I sho’ am hungry,” said Brer Tiger.
“That so?” Brer Rabbit returned. “Well, you just wait till I get through skinning this here Elephant I caught this morning and I’ll be down to take care of you.”
Brer Rabbit whispered in Brer Elephant’s ear: “When I put my nose on your neck, scream loud as you can. Don’t be scared. Just scream!”
Brer Elephant screamed so loud he knocked over a couple of trees.
“You wait right there, Brer Tiger. I be done skinning this Elephant in a few minutes.”
Brer Rabbit bent over and made like he was nibbling behind Brer Elephant’s ear. Brer Elephant screamed again. A couple of more trees fell.
Brer Tiger started inching backward.
“Where you going, Brer Tiger? I’m almost done. Be down to get you shortly. Just hold on.”
Brer Rabbit bent over; Brer Elephant screamed; some more trees fell, and Brer Tiger began putting himself into serious reverse.
“I’m all done now. Elephant blood is all right, but ain’t as good as Tiger blood from what I hear.”
Brer Rabbit made like he was about to get off the Elephant, but Brer Tiger wasn’t around to see if he did or not. He lit off from there and before noontime had moved out of his house and left the community.
After Brer Rabbit ran Brer Tiger out of the community, Brer Lion decided he better do something before he got run out. He sent word to the other animals that he was going to eat one member of every family.
Well, there was all kinds of crying and grieving going on in the community, but wasn’t nothing the animals could do about it. After a month or so, Brer Lion had eaten his way through every family except Brer Rabbit’s. He sent word to Brer Rabbit that it was his turn now.
Miz Rabbit and all the little Rabbits started crying and snifling and carrying on. Brer Rabbit smoked a cigar like wasn’t nothing wrong.
He left the house and went on down the road toward Brer Lion’s house. He was almost there when he stopped beside a deep lake. He mussed up his hair and drawed himself in until he was hardly big as a bar of soap that everybody in the family had taken a shower with. Then he looked at himself in the water. He looked like he had one foot in the grave.
He limped and wheezed up to Brer Lion’s house. Brer Lion looked at him and shook his head.
“Brer Rabbit, you won’t make more than a mouthful. I be hungrier when I get through eating you than I was before.”
“I know I ain’t fat, Brer Lion, and I probably got a lot of fleas on me. I got a bad cough, and my feets smell, and I got earwax in my navel. But I’m willing. I just want you to know that.”
Brer Lion stared hard at him, shaking his head. “I’m gon’ have to eat your whole family to get one decent meal if they all look like you.”
“Well, Brer Lion, when I was coming over here just now I saw a creature that was as big and fat as you. I said to myself that I wished I was that fat so Brer Lion could have a good dinner on me.”
“Who was that you saw?” Brer Lion wanted to know.
“Didn’t ask his name. I said my how-do’s to him and he don’t say nothing back. I decided I’d best get on away from him.”
“Show me where he is.”
“I be glad to, Brer Lion, but I’m afraid of what he might do to you.”
“Do to who?” Brer Lion roared. “Show me where he is. We’ll see who be doing what to who!”
Brer Rabbit shook his head. “I don’t want your death on my conscience.”
“TAKE ME TO HIM!”
Brer Rabbit shrugged. “All right. But I be there to back you up. Can’t no one animal deal with this creature. He gon’ break your legs, Brer Lion!”
Brer Lion was so mad he was trembling. He followed Brer Rabbit to the lake. Brer Rabbit looked around like he was afraid. “He was around here somewhere, and he still around. I can feel it in my bones.”
Brer Rabbit creeped forward and looked in the lake. He screamed and jumped back. “He’s in there, Brer Lion! Let’s get out of here!”
Brer Lion walked up to the lake and peered in. Sure enough, there was a creature looking back at him. Brer Lion hollered at him. Creature in the lake don’t say a word. Brer Lion shook his mane; creature shook his. Brer Lion showed his teeth; creature showed his. Brer Lion got so mad that he jumped into the lake head first.
Of course, Brer Lion don’t know nothing about swimming and he thrashed around in the lake like he was fighting some creature. He was fighting all right – fighting Ole Boy.
Don’t nobody win fights with Ole Boy.
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