1

One thing is certain. I would not even have considered the job if I had not been desperate.

Early in January, the Barnton Heath Engineering Company decided to close down the greater part of its works.

It was the day after I had asked Claire to marry me that the first blow fell. I had walked into my office that morning feeling very pleased with life. Not that, strictly speaking, I had any cause to feel pleased. She had promised to think about it carefully and let me know. Still, I felt pleased. A girl like Claire would, I assured myself, have made up her mind immediately if she were going to refuse. She was probably terrified that, if she didnt strengthen her position by reducing me to a state of jittering suspense, I might be tempted to play the dominant male and expect her to give up being a very promising surgeon in order to become a second-rate housekeeper. She has a dangerous theory that, when two persons get married, a court of inquiry ought to sit in order to determine from the available evidence which of the two is better fitted to assume responsibility for the housework-the husband or the wife. I had, however, not the slightest intention of asking her to give up her work. Quite apart from the fact that I did not wish her to do so, I knew perfectly well that, if it came to a trial of wills, she would win. She is very beautiful and very intelligent.

Towards lunch-time I was going over a batch of costs with my assistant when I received a message from the head office in London saying that Herrington, the General Manager, would like to see me that afternoon. Summonses from Herrington were rare. Wondering what it was all about and irritated at having to interrupt my work, I caught the two-forty-five at Barnton Station. At half-past three I saw Herrington. At four oclock I was walking slowly down Queen Victoria Street with a letter in my pocket informing me that owing to circumstances beyond the control of the Board, my services had to be dispensed with.

Herringtons carefully chosen words of regret still lingered in my ears.

Damned unfortunate, Marlow, but there it is. The Barnton Heath works just arent paying. Nothing to do with you, of course. Labours too expensive so near London. Felstead has warned us that he cant renew his contract at our price, and things are too shaky at the moment for us to risk keeping your show going. Question of cutting our losses. Hard-lines on you, of course. And hard-lines on us, too. Good production engineers dont grow on trees. You wont have any difficulty in getting fixed up. If theres anything I can do, let me know.

So that was that. I had a month in which to find another job. And things were shaky at the moment. Production engineers might not grow on trees; but then nor did jobs. Trade recession they called it in the newspapers. As far as I could see there wasnt a great deal of difference between a trade recession and a good old-fashioned slump. If theres anything I can do, let me know. Well, yes, there was something he could do. He could find me another job. But probably he hadnt meant quite that. Nice chap, Herrington, but a little too charming. Dammit no! That was humbug. He wasnt a nice chap. Id always loathed him like poison and hed detested me. Hed probably been quite pleased to get rid of me. Hed never quite forgiven me for making him look a fool over the original Felstead estimates. Still, there it was. No use getting sorry for myself. I knew plenty of people who might put me on to something good. I might even get something better. No need to panic, anyway. Plenty of time. Id telephone Dowsett in the morning and see if he knew of anything going. There were the men to be thought of, too. They were Halletts responsibility, of course, and he would do his best for them; but it would be devilish for some of them, all the same. The girls would quickly be absorbed by neighbouring factories. Girl labour was at a premium in the Barnton district. The skilled men would not have much trouble either: those munition people two miles away would jump at them. It was the rest, the unskilled, the clerks and storekeepers with wives and families, who would suffer. I ought to be thanking my stars.

When I got back to the works I went straight to Hallett.

Youve heard the news, of course, I said.

He sniffed. Yes. Herrington wanted me to break it to you, but I told him to do his own dirty work. He actually had the nerve to suggest to me, too, that we keep quiet about it so far as the works were concerned until three days before we shut down. Theres the tail end of the Felstead contract to complete, and I suppose hes afraid of the production figures falling off over the month. I told him to go and boil himself. Quite apart from the fact that a good many of them ought to do some quick saving if they can, the girls in the turret shop are organising a social club. Their foreman tells me theyre going to ask me to be President. I shouldnt be able to look myself in a glass if, knowing what I do, I let them go on with it.

I nodded. Youre right. I was thinking of that side of it while I was coming down. You and I are about the only people sitting pretty over this business.

He looked at me curiously. You think so? I hope youre right, Marlow. Personally, Ive got a wife, three kids and a house on mortgage to think about. My idea is that the only people who are sitting pretty, as you put it, are Herrington, his plump-backed Board and the dear shareholders. Did you see the last balance-sheet?

No?

It was a sight for sore eyes. The Forces of Fat, Marlow, move in strange and mysterious ways. Who are we, the mugs who do the job, to question their wisdom? All the same, I do question it. But, then, Im only a blank-dash Socialist.

I left him composing a round-robin to the foreman. Not till then did I remember that I was meeting Claire at seven oclock.

I broke the news over the soup.

She was wearing a new hat-a fact upon which I had been careful to comment-but it was not the sort of hat behind which she could hide while she thought of something to say. She looked as though she wished it had been.

Thats bad, Nicky, she said. Her voice was quite steady. She paused and then added: I hope that youre not going to let it interfere with the wedding.

We were eating in a Chinese place, and I have heard that the Chinese are a very difficult race to astonish; but I seem to remember seeing the cook, a Cantonese with a figure like a water butt, goggling incredulously at us through the service door. By the time I had returned to my side of the table, the entire restaurant was buzzing with comment. There was some giggling. Blushing, we got on with our food.

And now, said Claire some minutes later, that that is settled, what are you going to do about keeping me in the style to which I have been unaccustomed?

A wave of remorse swept over me. Look here, I urged weakly. This is all wrong. We shouldnt be talking about marriage at this time. Things are pretty bad at the moment. It may be months before I can get the job I want. Thats all right as far as it goes. The bank will stay friendly for a bit. But I wouldnt like to make any statement about my prospects. Not for publication, that is. What would your father say?

Hell say exactly what I tell him to say.

But

Listen, Nicky. She wagged her chopsticks at me. Youre thirty-five, five foot ten in your socks and handsome to boot. More important, youre a very clever engineer. Hallett told me so that night we had dinner with him and his wife. Why shouldnt you get a good job? Things may be slow just now, but not for first-rate men. Dont be so silly. Besides, Im twenty-nine; and a female in my position who isnt married by that time ought to be forced to eat her own scalpel.

She succeeded, almost, in convincing me. At all events, for the rest of that evening we forgot about such things as money. To be more precise, we went to a cinema, sat in the back row and held hands. The film, I remember, was very bad. We enjoyed it enormously and took a taxi to her home. Her father gave me a whisky and soda and asked me what I thought of the foreign situation in general with particular reference to the prospects of the Rome-Berlin axis breaking over the Czech question. I forget what I replied. After a bit he looked at us over his glasses, smirked and trotted off to bed. I went home finally by an all-night tram. I was in excellent spirits. I hummed a tune to myself. She was right, bless her heart. I knew my job. I should be all right. It was the man without qualifications who suffered when trade receded.

But I was wrong.

It took me about two and a half months to find out just how wrong: two and a half months of raised hopes and disappointments, of fruitless interviews and abortive correspondence. Towards the end of my last week at Barnton, I was offered a job at two-thirds the salary I had been getting and turned it down. Six weeks later I would have given my left arm for the chance; but it was too late. I knew that Hallett had thought me a fool and, when he carefully refrained from saying I told you so, it didnt improve matters. He himself had accepted an offer at fifty per cent. less than Barnton had paid and seemed relieved. I began to get worried and, I am afraid, irritable.

Claire was amazingly good about it all; but I was in a mood to imagine things, and began to suspect that she was losing confidence in me. Foolish of me, no doubt. She, too, was worried; but not as much by my difficulties as by the effect they were having on me. The plain truth is that I was rapidly losing confidence in myself. Then we had a slight quarrel. In itself it was trivial, but other circumstances were to render it important.

We were sitting, rather gloomily, over tea. It was a Tuesday afternoon, and she had left the hospital for an hour to hear the result of an interview with a Birmingham man who was in London for the day. The result was negative. The man from Birmingham had been very pleasant and had given me introductions to two firms from both of which I had already drawn blanks. She heard the news in silence.

Well, I added bitterly and very childishly, when do we get married? Or would you prefer to call it off?

Dont be a fool, Nicky. She paused. Anyway, I dont see why all this should interfere with our plans. Just because things are a bit tiresome at the moment, theres no reason why we shouldnt go ahead. She paused again. After all, she went on lightly, Ive got a perfectly good job and they talk about giving me more money soon.

Thats very nice, darling, I snapped. And what am I supposed to do? Sit in the furnished bed-sitting-room and darn your stockings?

It was rude and unpleasant enough, but it was only the beginning. I said a lot of things I didnt mean; pompous things about a man having a certain substratum of self-respect to consider and the ignominy of living on a wifes earnings, none of which bore the slightest relation to what she had meant.

She sat tight-lipped and silent until I had finished. Then she said: I didnt think you could be such an ass. With that she got up and walked out of the shop.

Of course, we made it up that evening. But there was a reservation about the reconciliation of which we were both conscious. When I left that night, she put on her coat and walked with me a little way.

You know, Nicky, she said after a while, youve done a terrible lot of apologising to-night. I feel rather bad about it. I know very well its all my fault really. If Id had a grain of imagination Id have known that youd got enough to worry about without having a confounded nitwit of a girl talking marriage at you to make it worse.

I stopped dead in my tracks. What on earth are you getting at, Claire?

Go on walking, darling, and Ill tell you. We went on. You remember that engineering paper you left in the hall the other night?

Yes, what about it?

I had a look through it, Nicky. Youd marked an advertisement in the Appointments Vacant Section. Do you remember it?

Yes, vaguely.

Well?

I spluttered. Good heavens, Claire, youre not suggesting?

Why not? It fits your qualifications exactly. It might have been designed specially for you. And then, as I began to expostulate once more: No, listen, Nicky. It would do you good.

I halted again. Now you listen to me, sweet. There are some things which are fantastic and absurd, and this is one of them.

She laughed. All right, but here-she produced a piece of paper from her bag and thrust it into a pocket of my overcoat-I tore it out in case you might want to change your mind. Good night, darling.

When at last I continued my walk to the station, I had completely forgotten about the piece of paper.

A week went by. Those seven days were the most depressing I have ever spent. For the first six of them nothing at all happened. Then, on the morning of the seventh, I received a letter from a famous engineering firm in answer to an application of mine in reply to an advertisement for a works manager in one of their smaller factories. I was to call at their offices at three oclock that day.

At three oclock I was there. With me in the reception room were two other men. Both were middle-aged. Both, I guessed, were there on the same business as I was. I was right.

I was the last to be seen by the works director. He greeted me with an air of patient amiability.

Oh yes-he glanced at my letter lying on the spotless blotting-pad in front of him-Mr. Marlow, isnt it? Yes, yes. Now, I asked you to call for a special reason. Quite frankly we consider you a little too young for consideration in connection with the post under discussion at the moment. He primped his moustache wearily. I waited. However, he went on, we could use a young, unmarried man with your qualifications in connection with an important contract we have just secured. Mind you, Im not making you a definite offer. If youre interested well discuss it further. The-er-salary, naturally, is not very large. You probably know how bad things are at the moment, eh? And, of course, it would mean signing on for four years. Still, I dont suppose that would worry a young man like you. Its a great place, Bolivia, a great

I interrupted the flow. Where did you say?

He looked surprised. Bolivia. The Chaco war, he went on confidently, showed them the need for relying upon their own resources in time of war. It is a question of establishing two factories and putting them on an economical production basis. The experience alone

But I had risen. I could feel that I had become very red in the face. Thank you very much, I said curtly. I am afraid, however, that my time is valuable this afternoon. I must apologise for wasting yours. I feel sure that you will find the man you want quite easily.

He stared at me for a moment, then shrugged. Naturally. Good afternoon. Pull the door to behind you as you go, will you?

Outside, I bought an evening paper, crossed to a teashop and ordered a cup of tea. Then I noticed that, seated at the next table was one of the men I had seen in the reception room. On a sudden impulse, I leaned across to him.

Excuse me, sir. I hope youll forgive my asking; but, as a matter of interest, do you mind telling me if you have just been offered a post in South America?

He looked startled. He was a grey-haired man with a heavy, intelligent face and large, capable hands. He examined me suspiciously. Then he grinned.

So they tried that on you too, did they? Well, I dont mind telling you. He did offer me a job in South America-at three quid a week. Said I was too old for the job advertised. Bolivia and three quid a week! Me! I told him what he could do with it. I dont think he liked it much.

I suppose, then, that the other man got the real job.

Real job? He laughed derisively. There isnt any real job, my friend. Thats just a way of getting good men cheap. Ive seen that game before. They cut their price to compete with the United States and the Monroe Doctrine. Then they have to make their precious profit. I might have fallen for it, but luckily Ive got a job of sorts, selling small tools. He indicated an attache-case on the chair beside him. Cheap Jap stuff.

I offered him a cigarette. We went on talking. Bit by bit I learned something of his career; and, as I listened to the quiet, almost casual account of the work he had done, I knew that here was a man beside whose qualifications and experience mine were second-rate. This man knew his job supremely well. Other things being equal, no management with any sense would have hesitated to choose him in preference to me. And yet, here he was selling small tools, Cheap Jap stuff. When I asked him how business was, he smiled.

I wouldnt know about that, he said ruefully; Im not much good as a traveller. Its a very difficult thing to be good at. Ive no patience, very little tact, and Im always getting peoples backs up by showing them how they ought to run their businesses. Besides, I cant help telling them just how bad my stuff is. Im trying to improve, but its tough going. He called for his bill. Its time I was off. Glad to have met you.

When he had gone I tried to read my evening paper. Herr Hitler had reaffirmed the principle of the Rome-Berlin collaboration. Signor Mussolini had made another speech from the balcony of the Palazzo di Venezia. The chairman of an armaments combine had announced complacently that profits for the previous year had proved extremely satisfactory and had expressed confidence in the future of the company. Another Balkan state had gone Fascist. A Croat living in the Paris suburbs had dismembered his mistresss body with a hatchet. A banker had welcomed improved prospects for foreign lending. There were two pictures on the front page: one of two grinning and embarrassed soldiers riding on a new type of tank, the other of a famous statesman, looking like an apprehensive vulture with a fishing-rod in one hand and a very small fish in the other. On page four was an article entitled: In thy strength, O Britain by an ex-naval officer who, I happened to know, was also a director of a naval construction yard.

I put the paper down, finished my tea and felt in my pocket for a match to light a cigarette. My fingers encountered the piece of paper. I drew it out, smoothed it on the table and read the advertisement through again very carefully.

REQUIRED by Midland firm. Thoroughly experienced production engineer to take charge of Continental office. Must speak fluent Italian and have had experience of high-production practice. Language qualification essential. Generous salary and commission to right man. Excellent prospects. Apply, stating age, experience (in detail) and when available, to Box 536X.

I dont know what had possessed me to mark it. Maybe it was the bit about the Italian that had struck me as odd. After my parents had died I had shared a room with an Italian fellow-student who had taught me his language in exchange for mine. It had all been part of a plan to spend our summer vacation walking south from Naples. The plan had never matured. We had quarrelled a week before we had been due to start. But my Italian had remained, nourished by an occasional novel from Hachettes and, lately, vague ideas about a honeymoon in Rome.

I put the paper back in my pocket. It was out of the question, of course. Absurd. Claire, bless her heart, was talking nonsense.

But the fact that I put the paper back in my pocket instead of throwing it away was, I think, significant. Almost without my knowing it, the seed of the idea was swelling in my mind. That evening when I arrived at my flat, the seed bore fruit. There were two letters for me. Both had the word regret in the first line.

I had a bath, changed my clothes, sat down by the fire and lit a cigarette. For ten minutes I remained there, thinking. Then I got up. There was, after all, no harm in writing. It would probably come to nothing, anyway. Besides, even if I were offered the job, I could always change my mind.

By the way, I remarked casually later that evening; just as a matter of interest, Ive written for that Italian job. I wouldnt take it, naturally, but theres no harm in seeing what its all about.

I thought youd be sensible, darling, said Claire.